I’ve gotten a lot of responses to my blog post “On being a solo female hiker.” Almost all of them have been positive and I feel encouraged to know that I have a community of supportive men and women. However, there is one response that I would like to address, and I will tell you why. As women, we do not have to live in fear, and I would never want my stories about the trail to deter a female from hiking solo. So I felt sad when I received this note,
Looked at the link to solo hiking. Wow. I can’t imagine worse advice for any young woman. I’m a criminal justice major, just graduated actually, from PSU and I would NEVER, EVER encourage a young woman to solo hike. As to “sex starved guys” these are just the types that sexually assault solo female hikers. Responsible women understand that the world is not a fairy tale and they don’t hike solo, no matter what lame excuse may be provided regarding freedom and/or safety. Good luck.
I appreciate this woman speaking her mind and I think that her goal is to protect other women, which I respect. But I have to disagree with her saying that it isn’t responsible to hike solo, because, honestly, the trails are way safer than cities. In two and a half months of backpacking, I may have felt annoyed by men talking about “plastic boobs,” but I never felt in danger from anything but bears and rabid voles.
Even though I joke about being lonely on the trail, solo hiking has tremendous benefits. I have had so much time to sort out things in my head, to discover what it means for something to be beautiful and to get a clearer picture of what I want my community to look like. Even running into those frustrating men has given me the opportunity to grow in assertiveness and have stronger boundaries. In fact, I am now more confident in my ability to take care of myself.
Women can get hurt anywhere. I do have a friend who was attacked recently, but this happened in a town. She had driven to Gorham, NH to visit me and was assaulted while she was waiting for me to arrive. Even though this was terrible, I am certain that she would never be to tell women to let fear deter them from from being independent. Her response was to press charges against the man who attacked her. Even when the police told her several times that it was “a lot of work” to fill out the paper work and that the man was “very sorry,” she insisted on advocating for herself and I am proud of her for that. That whole situation still makes me furious, but, to me, the most constructive response to things like that is to rally around survivors and insist on justice.
It is fairly obvious that no woman can avoid being alone in cities. Both men and women get hurt all of the time and that is a reality we must all wrestle with, but fear can be poison. Be alert and be aware of your surroundings, but don’t be crippled by your fear of getting hurt.
And not to belabor a point, and I am going to risk being annoying by putting this in bold: The woods are much, much safer than cities.
I’m afraid that my stories about the trail may have told only one side of the story. I want to point out that I met a lot of wonderful men on my trip. Here are a few examples. I stayed in a hut with Frank N. Stein and Brave Little Toaster. Frank N. Stein can recite all of Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” like it is an Edgar Allen Poe poem. And, yes, it was a life altering experience for me to hear it. TNT and I traveled together for a few days and discussed fate, community, and the annoying college freshmen that kept us up late at night. Big Blues and I got lost together, trespassed by sleeping behind a small town historical society, and had deep talks over a box of Fruit Loops. Men have told me that I am doing a great job and that I should keep it up, others have said that they are proud of me and glad that women have the opportunity to hike solo. There is an ever growing community of people who want to encourage females to be independent, and I think that we as women can draw upon both this support and our own inner strength when we want to explore the world.
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Interesting blog and I want to give you kudos on showing women you don’t have to be a victim of fear. I mountain bike solo and get grief from friends and (especially) my mother about being out “there” alone. I understand the fear but the feeling of being on the trails away from people and in the trees far outweighs the fear of animals and other unpleasant possibilities. I do like Piper’s idea about the buffer zone and will take that into consideration when I venture out to my first solo trip that’s on my list of things to do before I can’t walk anymore.
Thanks. If you do go on your first solo trip, send me an e-mail. I’d love to hear about it.
Here’s to buffer zones.
You are so right that you are far safer on the trails than in the city. I had my own personal rule to never sleep within 10 miles of a major road. That was because I never saw a gun, an inexperienced backpacker, or anybody who wasn’t thru-hiking any further out that that. Most people who will do you harm never go further than 1/2 mile from a car, so 10 miles is a generous buffer zone.
That’s a great idea. I’ll keep that in mind for my next trip.
Hey it’s Mississippi. We met at the barn in New Hampshire and I wanted to stop by your blog and say hello. I ran across this message and I have to say there were MANY solo female hikers this year going Northbound. I know the day I started and the day before the females actually outnumbered the guys. I think it is great. As you probably know, out on the trail people are looking to hook up. We all stink, are tired etc. We are alseep by 9 and up and out by 7. It is a live changing experience and anyone interested Should do it.. both mail and female. I hope all is well.
That’s great! I don’t know why there were so few solo SOBO women. I actually had several NOBOs tell me I was the only they met (although I knew of a few more). I think next time I head out on the trail I’ll go northbound so that I can meet more of the community.
Hey! I just wanted to congratulate you on an awesome blog and series of posts. Power to you and thanks for your eloquent advocacy, and for showing it is more than safe and possible for women to hike alone
Happy adventures
Thanks for the compliment. It is definitely safe for women to hike alone, and I hope more and more of us get out there and do it.
“Frank N. Stein can recite all of Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” like it is an Edgar Allen Poe poem” – this has inspired me to re-read the lyrics and say them to myself in a Christopher Lee-esque way.
Ha! I hope that goes well for you.
I ‘Stumbled Upon’ your first solo female hiker post and had to read this followup.
First, let me apologize for the errant members of my gender, even though I personally had nothing to do with their behavior. I admire your guts to tackle the hike, and I absolutely love your attitude about the problems you’ve had with boorish men.
It’s wonderful that you can focus on what you set out to do and not succumb to the fears that could come along. I’ve got a 25 year old daughter who’s toured with a band (Checkout Trampskirts on YouTube-she sings lead), and you’re probably right about relative safety of the trail versus the city. She knows how to take care of herself.
I still worry about her, always needlessly so far. I’d worry about you, too, if you were mine. With the economy I understand that a lot of young folks are hiking the trail out of college. Yours is the best story I’ve heard.
Thanks Martin! I am stumbling through my journey and appreciate the encouragement.
Thanks for the shout-out, my sista.
Sure thing. I hope it meets with your approval.
I do a lot of solo motorcycle traveling; I’ve covered a couple hundred thousand miles in the last ten years.
I wrote a piece for my website, on exactly this topic, but unfortunately I lost my site when the host evaporated. I pointed out that women do a lot of things alone, at home. Hardly any of us have someone hanging around to escort us to the grocery store or the ATM or on the commute to the office, and if we do have someone like that, the relationship is likely pathological.
Anyways, I did a lot of research, linked to the CDC website. The statistics show that women are in vastly more danger from people they know. This is especially true of rape and murder. They also show that when you just look at stranger danger, men are in far more danger than we are. In my article, I suggested that the road is very dangerous for men and they should consider staying home where they will be safe.
That’s great! Do you still have the link?
You are and will continue to make a major impact in all th women that you pass in this journey through life…love u little lady
I’ve traveled around the world (literally) as a solo traveler. Yes, there were times when I felt like my safety was at risk, but probably no more than any other traveler. Although this is not the same as hiking solo in the woods, I can testify that any kind of solo traveling is as dangerous or safe as staying home. While I was traveling in the dangerous country of Papua New Guinea, a female friend of mine was abducted in her hometown mall underground parking lot, raped, and murdered. So…all that to say that I agree with you, Addy.
You are a brave lady, Luanne.