My hiking buddy, Erin, just finished reading my blog (not something I require any of my friends to do), and she came up with a mash-up of the last year and a half. This may only be funny to us. Here goes nothing:
-You met some vegan jerks on the AT (named Strips & Primal) and they told you how ADORABLE you were!
-An emergency blanket is essential to backpacking because it can be used as a hiking skirt.
-Chairback Mountain was the original title to Brokeback Mountain until the writer was inspired to create the new title after attempting to hike a mountain in Maine.
-Pidgeon is the method of delivery for drop boxes along the trail…and somehow the boxes always have dirty joke written on the outside…
-In the 100 Mile Wilderness, there is militaristic cult led by Mango Mamma, who allows pictures of trees an waterfalls to only be taken in B&W during the month of July.
-A Dutch couple from Holland were ‘submudging‘ next to you in a lean-to and you decided never to eat pudding again!
-Cytomax was the new pair of combat boots your mom gave you for your birthday that you wore in the shower…yeah, that’s right:)
-A person named Icebreaker made up songs on the trail…your favorite was “Vole With It (bounce box style)”.
-You shaved your head when you were trying out the trail name Quarter Dome.
-A caretaker named lady bits made you cheesy pan pizza biscuits one morning.
-Ray Jardine is a Star Trek character who drinks root beer floats and has had commitment problems ever since his run-in with a bear shark!
-Poison Oak was a trail that….kicked…your…BUTT! I don’t think I’ll every attempt that one!
-Southbound is the term used to describe what happens when you eat too much Mac n’ Cheese that you mixed with coke and alcohol on a stove. Not pretty!
-Your body odor was so strong that you had hallucinations and a mosquito told you that you were the cutest girl in Maine.
-You met a cute looking Tortoise who you named Sally and developed a relationship similar to the one Tom Hanks had with Wilson the volleyball in Castaway.
Thanks Erin!
